(Tom Hanks speaks) Ladies and Gentlemen, the moment you have all been waiting for. Best Screenplay adapted from a blog. And the Oscar goes to…
GEN X MAMA FOR HER SCREENPLAY ADAPTED FROM HER BLOG GEN X MAMA’S RAMBLING MUSINGS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(Announcer) This is Gen X Mama’s first nomination and win from the Academy.
(Gen X Mama graciously enters the stage wearing a linen white chiffon dress encrusted in Swarovski crystals, size 4 (hey! it’s my f&@!ing dream!). Her Neil Lane diamond necklace, earrings and bracelet, which are a total of 300 carets and valued at $100,000,000, are said to be a gift from the famed jeweler. Gen X Mama receives her Oscar and large hugs from Tom Hanks, who can’t stop hugging and kissing her.)
(Gen X Mama) Oh my goodness! What a surprise! Oh wow, so much to say! First, I would like to thank the Academy for this incredible honor. A huge thanks to Martin Scorsese for being an avid reader of my blog and coming to me wanting to make my blog into a movie, that he directed. Love you Marty!
(Martin Scorsese screams from the audience) YOU ROCK GEN X MAMA!
(Gen X Mama) Also a huge thanks and lot’s of love to my girl Maya Angelou, who has been such a strong believer in me.
Ya know, when I started this blog, I wanted it to be a place to write down and share my thoughts with the world. Having been a SAHM for 9 years has had it’s challenges, but oh so many rewards…when the dishes and laundry are done…or when I wasn’t walking out of the house with baby barf on my shoulder that dripped down my arm…or when I wasn’t stepping over the 2 year old who had just thrown himself onto the floor, kicking and screaming because he wanted to watch Mickey Mouse NOW…or when I wasn’t telling the 7 yr old to stop picking on his sister…or when I wasn’t telling the 10 yr old to stop crying because said 7 yr old was picking on her…or running around frantically trying to get my backpack filled with books since I am a college student…still…or when I am screaming at The Dude to hurry his ass home so I could get away from the demon spawn and escape to the library where I would be then writing an 11,000 word paper on something in women’s studies for six hours…hmmm…yeah, I am sure the rewards are in there…somewhere…
Anyway…a HUGE thank you goes out to The Dude. My life partner. My partner in crime. My partner in love. My partner in our dreams of having adult children. Also, huge thank you’s to Gen X Girl, Gen X Boy, and of course our Little E. And especially, to my fans. THANK YOU! THANK YOU! THANK YOU!
Gen X Mama leaves the stage, blowing kisses out to the audience. Random celebrities are seen jumping all over, trying to get her kisses in the wind. A fight erupts between Brad Pitt and Gerard Butler over an invisible kiss.
Angelina Jolie rushes to Pitt, offering him a real kiss, to which he proclaims “The only lips I ever want a kiss to come from are from Gen X Mama!” Gerard is furious over this and proceeds to break Brad’s nose.
Gen X Mama 
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