Monkee’s theme song> Here she comes…walkin’ down the street…she get’s the funniest looks from…everyone she meets…hey! hey! She’s Evil Mommy! Her kids say she yells too loud! But she’s too busy screaming (at them) to care what they are saying…
Yeah, you get the picture. Another crazy morning of running around, trying to get everyone ready and out the door on time. But, what do you do when it’s not the Donna Reed morning? Why, you hysterically scream and yell and make sure to scare the crap out of your children as they are walking out the door. Wouldn’t mornings be easier if they were like this…
I don’t get it. I don’t understand. The morning was so promising. Everyone was up on time and then all hell seemed to break loose! X Girl takes forever to get dressed, X Boy takes forever to eat, Lil’ E is yelling from his crib “MA! I UP! I AWAKE! GET. ME. OUT!” Teeth need to be brushed, beds made, X Girl and Boy need to stop fighting. “I SAID STOP FIGHTING! JUST STOP TALKING TO EACH OTHER! DON’T EVEN LOOK AT EACH OTHER! YOU, get in the bathroom & brush your teeth! YOU get in your room and make your bed! YOU! Oh, sorry Lil’ E, let me pat your head as you are walking around the chaos that is your home.”
Donna made it look so easy! I remember watching this show on Nick at Nite when I was a kid, dreaming of the Reed family and about the happiness that I would bring to my own family one day…fast forward 25 years and it’s “IF YOU TWO DON’T GET YOUR BUTTS DOWNSTAIRS RIGHT NOW, YOU ARE GOING TO MISS THE BUS AND THEN YOU ARE WALKING TO SCHOOL!” Yeah, I am that evil. Like I said, Evil Mommy rears her ugly head!
The bus comes. It starts to leave. My neighbor stops it as my children are running out the door. X Girl is walking down the driveway at a leisurely pace when I yell to her to run, the flippin bus is waiting! Yeah, that got a “Oh my Gd Mom! Calm down!”
Now you do know what is coming next, don’t you? YUP! Wait for it…wait for it…door closes..SLAM! MOM GUILT!! My babies just left with all of us mad and frustrated and me screaming like a frickin’ lunatic! Nope, not a good morning. But, what can I do? Make cookies, vacuum, and hope that their day is not ruined? Let’s see what Donna has to say about this situation…
Yup, just try to make it up to them in the afternoon.
Gen X Mama 
If evil mom did rear her ugly head, how would kids know they need to get their butts out the door and on the bus? I think evil mom is a necessary evil in life and at the end of the day, all the kids remember is that there mom was there to tuck them into bed at night and make their boo-boo better when the fall.
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